By Fatou Kine Dieye
Updated September 04, 2001

Not much to report this week, as I am still in the process of trying to get back on track after my temporary lapse. My trainer has kicked things up a notch and my workout is peppered with active rests that include things that I never thought I would be able to do, such as push-ups (not the lady ones where you can rest on your knees, but the real deal!) and mountain climbers. Yahoo! I still havent totally banished the words “I cant do it” from my vocabulary, but Im able to prove myself wrong when I say it, which is definitely a step in the right direction.

Instead of dwelling on my transgressions from the last week, Ive decided that Im going to focus on looking ahead. My goal is to ride my bike to work at least four times this week and make it to the gym three times outside of my meetings with the trainer. I would also like to try out some of the classes offered by the gym. My thinking is that if I get hooked on one of those classes, I will further reinforce the concept of a regular workout routine, thereby relying less on motivation and more on habit. Im hoping that will be a good thing for me.

My food plan for this week includes keeping a fully stocked refrigerator. So far, so good; I ordered my groceries and am ready to go for the next several days. I still need to work on purchasing the right amounts, as I often end up throwing out food that has gone bad because I wasnt able to consume all of it by the expiration date.

The nutritionist was right: It is extremely challenging to cook for only person on a daily basis. In sticking to the meal plan, Ive successfully reduced my portion sizes and increased the variety of things on my plate, but Ive also created a situation in which I open a lot more packages of food and eat less of it—which means it is apt to go bad. I have a feeling that the solution to my problem is the freezer, but the thought of eating frozen food makes me sad, so I havent ventured there yet. I feel the time passing on this wonderful adventure and that, too, makes me sad, sad, sad. The more I think of it, the more anxious I get to reach my goal weight, which stresses me out and makes me crave a cookie or Peppermint Pattie….