Jade Roper Tolbert Reveals She Miscarried After Getting Pregnant on Bachelor in Paradise
After beginning her post with "I had a miscarriage," mom-to-be Jade Roper Tolbert admitted, "These words have burned inside me for over three years"
In an impassioned Instagram post she shared on Wednesday, The Bachelor alum revealed that she and now-husband Tanner Tolbertconceived during their season 2 stint on Bachelor in Paradise but ultimately lost the baby.
“I had a miscarriage. These words have burned inside me for over three years,” began Jade, 32. “I was honestly so scared to share our story, because I have always had this inner voice that’s said I don’t matter as much, especially when it comes to my struggles or my pain.”
“My journey with my grief has been a rollercoaster, and so I’ve never even known really where to start with telling others,” the former reality star writes, admitting that she has “also been afraid to tell people Tanner and I got pregnant on Bachelor in Paradise while filming.”
Tanner and Jade Roper Tolbert with daughter Emerson / Jade Roper Tolbert/Instagram
Jade shares with her followers that she has “been keeping this weight for a long time” but is now ready to come forward as she and Tanner, 31, prepare to welcome a sibling for their daughter this August.
“Being pregnant with our second child, all these emotions have been on the surface for me,” she reveals. “I just felt it was time to get it out of me and share our story and honor our baby.”
“Thank you for all the kind words, they’ve made me feel very loved and have made me feel less alone. ,” Jade concludes, inviting her fans to watch the couple’s vlog about the miscarriage — where Tanner explains that the couple conceived their first time having sex, during their time in the Fantasy Suite on BIP.
Jade announced the spouses’ new baby news on Instagram late last month alongside a pair of family photos taken on the beach, in which the mom-to-be was holding up a strip of ultrasound photos.
“Baby #2 is adding to our crew!! We are overjoyed our bundle of love will be joining us in August!” Jade captioned her post. “We’ve been dreaming of you for a while now, and you are already loved beyond imaginable, sweet baby.”
Eight months after welcoming Emmy, the spouses revealed that they were ready to have another baby. “We’re kind of low-key trying for another baby,” Jade told PEOPLE in April 2018. “We’ve been talking about it. We want our kids to be close in age so they’re close siblings, and I’m not getting any younger.”
“We’ll see when the next one happens, but yeah — we’re officially notnot trying!” chimed in Tanner.
The newest Tolbert family member won’t arrive for months, but he or she already has an Instagram account — boasting almost 63,000 followers.
Tanner and Jade have been using the account to keep their fans updated on the baby’s progress. Earlier this week, they shared a snapshot of the mom-to-be cradling her bump in a denim jumpsuit.
“16 weeks #bumpdate I am the size of a pickle … and still giving mommy some morning sickness but that’s okay … she will love me anyways …” the caption read. “I am 4.5 inches long and weighing 4 ounces … my ears are starting to develop and I think I’m starting to hear my parents talk to me … see you all in August!”
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This article originally appeared on People.com